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Does your therapist have a good relationship with food?

I found this post on the National Centre for Eating Disorders entitled ‘How to find a good eating disorders therapist

One of the tips suggests the following:

“About half of all eating disorder specialists have a history of disordered eating which is not necessarily severe; this is why we are passionate about this work. You have the right to ask whether they have a good relationship with food now. A good therapist will be able to answer you, simply and honestly. A therapist who is not recovered can still help you a little – but would you want to get alcohol treatment from a drunk? “Recovered” means that your therapist can eat a wide diet without missing out any nutrient like carbs. They should not be exercise obsessed and they are not following quirky diets. They can eat in front of others and they relate well to food, as a friend and as a way of taking care of themselves. They don’t spend much time thinking and worrying about what they have eaten and what they will eat. Their weight is stable; they probably don’t weigh themselves at all. They always practice what they preach, such as eating regularly and going easy on alcohol and other stimulants. (that’s how you stay recovered). Beware if they are too thin as well as morbidly overweight. (I shouldn’t say that should I). So ask them what they ate yesterday. Why not, they will certainly be asking you. You must have a therapist whom you respect and who inspires you with hope, not bizarre treatment ideas. Don’t be afraid to ask how they control chocolate of how they feel about their body image. No one’s eating is perfect but it can be perfectly imperfect and normal. You need a guardian angel if you are going to put your eating disorder behind you.”

First of all I am going to say I don’t actually like the tone of some of the language in this article - but, equally I understand the point of the article and what it is trying to achieve. I just think the language could be a little more compassionate, appropriate and less shaming/judgement. As an example, the line ‘would you want to get alcohol treatment from a drunk’ I think is somewhat inappropriate and lacks compassion and is a bit of slur if I’m honest. I have supported many people over the years with an alcohol problem and let me tell you most of them are not staggering around ‘drunk’, this is a dated, stereotypical statement which only helps perpetuate stigma around addiction.

‘Beware if they are too thin as well as morbidly obese’ Ouch. Can’t see too much HAES (health at every size) support here. Surely also a bit of fatphobia? Ultimately, in therapy we want to release the excessive, catastrophic fear of immediate weight gain, so I don’t think commenting on the therapist’s size or shape is particularly helpful to describe their current relationship with food.

So anyway, I was going to bullet list my current relationship with food (as of August 2023). Ultimately you want to know if I have a good relationship with food because you need to know this if you want to work with me. So here it goes:

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